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Aug 31, 2002

I'm writing a book about the unique trials of growing up half demonspawn. It's a subject I'm uniquely qualified to write about. Like mine, the main character's mother is Satan. This is crucial if you want to understand this little passage.

An exuberant Junior ran up to me in the hall, blonde hair bouncing around her like a bobbing corona.

"Hi!!" she said, managing to pronounce a double exclamation point. Normally it takes quite a skillfully operated thumbscrew to do that -- I should know. "I'm Mindy, from the FCA, and I want to ask you a question! Do you believe in God?" She delivered this in a hoarse little squeal she obviously thought was wise and mystical.

"Yes," I answered, without ceremony.

"Well," she said happily, "don't you want to accept the forgiving love of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?"

I stopped, turned, and looked right into her eyes. "Do you have any idea who you're talking to?"
Nick ::: 11:47 PM ::: 0 comments

Warning: The blog post below will piss all of you off. Please expect this and don't act all surprised, you corny, crumby jerks who really kill me and all.
Nick ::: 11:25 PM ::: 0 comments

I finished The Catcher in the Rye today. I think I must have heard waaaay too much hype: it was a total letdown. I've come to the conclusion that it's one of those books that is infinitely more interesting to discuss than to actually read, because I was bored to death reading it, but I had a very animated conversation telling my dad about it. Since most of you read it as part of a class, you enjoyed the discussion aspect of things a lot more than I did.

Frankly, the whole thing was far too episodic. I don't mind books which are somewhat episodic, so long as there is a unifying plot that the episodes drive. (Perks of Being a Wallflower was episodic but quite good.) The problem with Catcher was that the episodes didn't really affect the almost nonexistent plot. It's just a series of meetings. He meets these people, tells the reader how much he hates them, and then they go away, never to be mentioned again. These episodes aren't even revelatory. Think about the three women he dances with in the club -- what purpose do they serve other than filling up a few extra pages?

The next point is a matter of style, and I recognize that. I fully understand that the extremely limited vocabulary in the book is an integral part of the first-person stream-of-consciousness style. That doesn't make it any less damned annoying. I've been something of a one-sitting reader lately, and let me tell you, reading the same 15-20 words and 3-4 sentence structures over and over and over again for hours straight is not fun. I don't give a good goddamn if that corny Salinger was doing the crumby writing on purpose and all. It really kills me.

I don't know, but I like books with a plot that actually develops. There was a plot at the beginning, and then at the end, but all the rest of the book was just filler. The character doesn't develop until the very end, and none of the events except the first and last are related at all.

However, I'll accept the book for what it is: a conversation piece. This is not a book that you can hole up in your room with and savor for an entire lazy day of solitude. This is a book that you read for three minutes, and then talk about with your nerdy coffeehouse friends for hours. I read it the wrong way, I'll admit. But I think that when you're writing a book, you should expect that some people will read it in a sitting and not discuss it with anyone until afterwards.
Nick ::: 11:05 PM ::: 0 comments

Aug 30, 2002

I watched Clarke's copy of The Breakfast Club today. It was good except for one major flaw: not once, in the entire film, did I sympathize with the "criminal" character. I'm sorry, I honestly did look past all of the surface stereotype stuff, but what I saw was a nasty, petty person who treats other people like shit because he wants them to feel sorry for him. He just wants to get all this attention so he can turn around and hit them with how boo-hoo pitiful his home life is. I can't stand people like that. In fact, I was silently cheering on the Barry Manilowe guy in the closet scene! He did exactly what I would have done; he faced down the whiny little bitch and showed him how truly pathetic his act was.

I mean, honestly! "I have a cigar burn, so anything I do is morally justified" simply does not convince me.

If anyone can show me that I'm missing something, I'll be happy to change my mind about this. But I didn't see anything for myself...maybe I need to take Film and develop my movie appreciation skills.
Nick ::: 10:59 PM ::: 0 comments

Has anyone else ever walked into their bathroom, and it smelled like Pringles? Because I just walked into my bathroom, and it smelled like Pringles, and I couldn't help thinking to myself, "Why does my bathroom smell like Pringles? I don't have any Pringles, and even if I did, I certainly wouldn't keep them in my bathroom!"

Anyone? No?

Moving on, then.
Nick ::: 6:28 PM ::: 0 comments

Aug 29, 2002

Sara: "Why are guys such idiots?"
Nick: "Why are girls such bitches?"
Sara: "Because guys are such idiots."
Nick ::: 6:26 PM ::: 0 comments

Drew, if you'd like, I can host the images for your blog. Tripod is a whiny, non-remote-linking little bitch. I can get you a pretty fast, reliable host for them if you'd like.
Nick ::: 6:22 PM ::: 0 comments

Aug 28, 2002

This new incarnation of the dreaded college essay couldn't be more the opposite of the last. I'm tempted to say that it's the best essay I've ever written. I do know that it is definitely the most personally rewarding piece I've ever completed.

Sarah, I owe you so much for the suggestion of "Empire Records" as a topic. I think I'll upload the word file and put a link here shortly.
Nick ::: 10:25 PM ::: 0 comments

I am interested in too many colleges. Carleton, Colorado College, Columbia, Davidson, Drew U, Haverford, Marlboro, Middlebury, Pomona, Swarthmore, Whitman, and Williams. Those are all. I am so bad at narrowing lists down.
Nick ::: 6:58 PM ::: 0 comments

Ashleigh, the Cigarette Lighter Incident is possibly the dumbest thing I can imagine you doing. So look on the bright side, it can't get any worse.

Sterling, Daniel, if you guys have both of the couches, where am I going to hide from Mr. Poulos tomorrow? I can't stand another day as a Poulos Bitch. I may have to say that my part is coming up, even though at this rate we probably won't get to it until October.

Any of you who have already sent off your college applications need to talk to me for the newspaper article I'm doing. Even if you're only starting, your feedback will be very helpful.

I need to start talking to teachers about my college applications. It's just too much for me. I'm thinking of talking to Mr. Wade, Ms. Nicholson, and Mrs. Serkedakis and begging them for help. I'll bring in the Princeton 331 Best and a stack of post-its and beg. And then beg again. What a nightmare.
Nick ::: 6:49 PM ::: 0 comments

Aug 27, 2002

Drew, if it makes you feel any better, I had no clue that the essay was yours until you told me. But it was well-written.
Nick ::: 11:11 PM ::: 0 comments

I'd like to draw your attention to the little box on the left which says, "I link to people I've mentioned and by request." Apparently some people who wanted me to link to them didn't see it and now I've added Greetings from the Verge of Daylight to the list of Other People's Vastly Inferior Blogs.

For those of you who don't know, a "verge" is the side of a road. It's also called a "shoulder," as in "low or soft shoulder."
Nick ::: 7:26 AM ::: 0 comments

Aug 26, 2002

Hah! Haloscan comments worked perfectly the first time I tried. This must mean that I'm less than 10% moron.

Comment away. If you'd like to.
Nick ::: 7:28 PM ::: 0 comments

Hooray for Newsweek! They've published the truth on blogs. Thanks for the tip, Laura.

Blogging is a self-centered art form. You write about whatever you want to, and you aren't subject to peer review at all. Essentially, it's the newest permutation of what Daniel so eloquently described as "artistic wanking." The blogger writes stuff he thinks is interesting, and he reads it, and then he pats himself on the back for how interesting and insightful he is. There's a lot of artistic wanking going on these days in painting, sculpture, music, and drama. Now it's spread to the internet and writing.

Do I think that all blogs are wanks? Not really. Do I think that all my fellow bloggers are wankers? Not necessarily, although I'm watching you carefully. Do I think that occasionally a little wanking goes into my blog? It's possible, but I try to keep it to a minimum.

However, I do think that the vanguards of the blogging community are generally wankers who like to talk about the philosophical insights they gain from picking bits of gum off of their shoes. I think that blogging is a conduit for mass inanity and that most bloggers are simply trying to find a way to do something they perceive as important without putting any work into it.

My blog is a way for me to keep in touch with people when I can't speak to them. It's a way to post thoughts and ideas which may not be important but can hopefully be at least a little entertaining. Above all, my blog is destined to prove that blogging is a fad, and nowhere near as deep as it purports to be.
Nick ::: 7:17 PM ::: 0 comments

Aug 25, 2002

Drew, I like your mix tape except for one small flaw...where are all the Abbey Road songs? I'm not to the point where I can snap off the track list from memory, but I don't see any of the obvious ones and I don't think there are any at all. I know they almost didn't release it, but it's still right up there with the White Album for my personal favorite (at the moment). Come on, surely you could cram Her Majesty onto there, at least.

Speaking of mix tapes, I finished The Perks of Being a Wallflower today. I was so terrified that it would have some awful Ending of Doom®, but it didn't at all, it was very hopeful right at the end. I hate it when authors do horrible things to their characters for no reason. I'm glad that just this once, the author agreed with me. Whenever I write material, I'm always very conscientious about hurting characters.

At this point the hair vote is as follows:
Coppertop: 1
Red: 1
Blue: 1
Undecided: 1
Nick ::: 9:19 PM ::: 0 comments

Well, this blog has just about turned into non-stop bitching. What did you expect, anyway?

I'll try to turn it around. As always, other people's blogs are very good sources of material.

First of all, I'd like to present all my dedicated readers with an imponderable: how does Drew always have something to write about? Does he ration out blog concepts so that spurts of inspiration last longer? Does he have some book called 1001 Things About Your Life You Can Write About ? Or has he been reading some other group of blogs for ideas? I know that someone is going to tell me something along the lines of "He's just more sensitive and thoughtful than you are, you aluminum-hearted bastard," but I think there's more to it than that.

Oh, by the way, Sterling! Spikes! Cool! Everyone should wear spiked hair, except maybe women. If I can get photos of any of you, I'll add spikes with photoshop so you'll know how it would look. I'm sure once you've seen yourself with spiked hair, you'll switch.

Speaking of photoshop, I want to highlight my hair again, but I'm not sure which color to use. Please excuse my "Oh god is that a camera?" face.

Coppertop: This is what my hair looked like last year. All I did to the photo was fix the color curves and get rid of some red-eye.
Red: Currently the favored candidate. I added those crappy-looking glasses.
Blue: The underdog, but I'm not letting go because of the obvious Sonic the Hedgehog reference.

If you have any thoughts, e-mail me.

I think I set out to say something deep and insightful in this post, but I gave up about halfway through and forgot about it.
Nick ::: 2:55 PM ::: 0 comments